Ah, the magic of the Cup! Plucky lower league team gets to have a match against a proper team live on the telly. And gets totally embarrassed. Joy. Stephen Ord was in the bubble for TF.

***

Do you ever believe that Newcastle United can do anything easily? I’ve always worked on the basic premise that being a fan of Newcastle means we are predisposed to feel that anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. I’m not sure whether I’m in the minority or not, but I thought we were pretty awful at Liverpool. Today we needed a lift.

Luckily by arriving at St James Park at some time around 8 am on Saturday you would have got one: a free scarf, breakfast bar and a carton of water. As well as the opportunity for six thousand lucky ticket holders to jump on a coach to our local rivals.

The atmosphere on the buses wasn’t like a normal derby day, possibly due to time, lack of alcohol consumption or maybe nervousness. This game should not have been an issue, a team that has sacked their manager (again) a month ago and whose bounce had included beating two other mid-table Championship sides. But if any team can shoot themselves in the foot, then it’s Newcastle.

However, despite a queue that meant some people waited a full hour and a half for a beer, most of the journey down had been very efficient. Special mention to our group and any other poor soul who ended up on our broken double decker. I’m honestly amazed when it climbed to the top of Bowes Incline. If you were also one of the reckless souls who climbed aboard on the way back then well done! Great effort getting back.

To the game, and this was like an afternoon stroll. Once the supporters of that side had put their Amnesty banners down and their placard with a pound sign on that was covered in blood, they then picked up left over tinsel and started waving it about. Our support kindly asked them what that was? There was no response.

Bar two pretty cowardly tackles by Sunderland players that brought no cards from the ref, the first thirty minutes was a little frustrating. The away end being split over two tiers meant that the noise and atmosphere struggled to build. But it was clear that Gordon and Almiron were fired up to perform, Joelinton was smashing through midfield, and Isak scared them.

The run he made and then subsequent tumble looked a penalty to me. Craig Pawson said no; it was a no comment from Michael Oliver at half time. By then Newcastle led, Joelinton getting away and firing a ball towards the back post where Isak would have had a tap in. There to steal his glory was a defender (know idea what any of their names are), smashing it in the top corner and showing Sean Longstaff who’d missed an earlier chance how to finish.

The second arrived after half time (to big Joe departing) within a minute of the restart. The pressing was back. I’ve criticised Miggy a lot, but here he was excellent to win it back, square it and allow Isak to place the ball in the corner directly in front of us. Lots of punters missed it but it caused bedlam in one end and fury in the other. They may have as well have laid out a red carpet. Suddenly we were cruising.

Cue songs about residents of Sunderland not being seen in Milan, seagulls (and what might happen to them), and a previous Sunderland winger. Then it was time for songs about seeing them again at some point, not sure where or when, but I think on some sunny day.

The difficulty with a game like this, where one side is so utterly dominant and the other is supposed to be a rival, is that sometimes the score line doesn’t feel reflective. Pritchard (who played quite well against us for Huddersfield about seven years ago) had a dipping shot that kissed the top of the bar – Dubs didn’t look worried. He then calmed our nerves by making a smart save from some other player, I must confess I had no idea who that was either.

Meanwhile, the younger Bellingham was anonymous.

But this isn’t about them. It’s about us. Gordon got in and missed a great chance but then made one of those runs where the defender thinks all they can do is foul him. The first time new Sunderland hero Luke O’Nein clattered him. The second it was done by our previous own-goal scorer and a penalty was given. The gorgeous Swede didn’t miss.

They suddenly made clear that they are Sunderland til they die … by leaving and showing us all the empty seats. A chorus of you’ve seen United, now f**k off home was sent out and lots of home fans took that as their cue.

The less said about the policing on our departure the better. Whilst being back in Newcastle only two hours after the game finished was fine, the way in which it was done to me was dangerous. Kettling fans between vans, when there weren’t any opposition fans left, seemed to be unnecessary.

But nothing could take the shine off it. A strolling win, our first away since Man U, and maybe, just maybe dropping Trippier for Liverpool has paid dividends.

Get in!! Into City now.

Stephen Ord @smord84