Alan Pardew simply has to go. This man has made history as the most incompetent coach SackPardewto ever lead our club into derby matches. But that’s not the only reason he should resign. He has the worst record in derby matches of any other since 1892 and I expect if he is still doing whatever the fuck he does for the trip to Wearside later this season, he’ll lose that one as well. The man is a bum.

If the defeats to Sunderland were some kind of blemish on an otherwise sparkling managerial record at United I think we would grin and bear it. They are not. The man is unable to win a big game. Sure, he’ll pull off the odd enjoyable success against our betters when they have an off-day and for all the wins this season against Man City, Spurs, Liverpool and Chelsea were enjoyable, they weren’t big games for them. That’s probably how we managed to win them. No, when there is expectation, when there is pressure to win, to deliver, Pardew has failed and he will continue to fail. He is what he is – a puppet, a bluffer, a man without any credibility, an empty suit, a man like so many on the Ashley payroll at St James’ Park who has been promoted well beyond his ability and who in return for a seat in the big chair will endure any indignity because he and the likes of Charnley, Carver et al. have nowhere else to go at this level. We have hardly ever worried that Pardew will be poached away for some bigger job and we do know that when he is finally fumigated from our club (hopefully with Ashley) he will be fortunate to get a job in the Championship. For crying out loud it’s not like he comes here with a great managerial history is it? A brief flirtation with West Ham before being shown the door, relegation with Charlton and a seedy, unhappy spell with Southampton, whose success has continued relentlessly without him.

There have been continuing rumours about Pardew’s relationship with Ashley with salacious gossip about casino debts to add to the stories which have followed him from West Ham to Southampton. There certainly appears to be the whiff of something not quite right about Pardew but let’s face it an Ashley appointee from the assembly line of Wise, Jimenez and Kinnear says everything about the recruitment policy at Newcastle United. Jobs for the bluffers!

Pardew has been at United for four long, unproductive years. I am at a loss to identify what his footballing philosophy actually is. If he even has one. When I see Newcastle United lining up at home in a derby game against opponents who started the day a mere one point ahead of Burnley playing one up front, my heart sinks! When that one striker is a kid who was playing Spanish second division football last season with a lack of physical presence having balls lashed up to him from all angles, I really wonder what the fucking game-plan is. Crosses into the box with no player with any aerial presence? What the fuck is all of that about man?

When I see Gouffran in a Newcastle United shirt contributing absolutely nothing at all I really do wonder what the fuck is going on at our club. When Armstrong is brought into the fray ahead of our leading goal-scorer with the team ostensibly pressing for the winner, I wonder if the pillock in the dug-out has a head full of rocks.

We ended the game looking desperate, with no shape at all having left it far too late to have any real ambition to win the game. Sunderland kept their discipline and applied the coup-de-grace. Poyet knows how to play these games. Pardew evidently, painfully does not.

There was just so much wrong with the way that team was set up it was untrue. The substitutions were all wrong. The tactics were woeful and let’s consider this, Pardew could not find a way through a defence marshalled by O’Shea and Brown who are way beyond their sell-by dates but that is the third season in a row this manager has failed to put out a side in a derby match which has even been able to score a fucking goal.

For those who think Graeme Carr is some kind of wunder-scout I think it is fair to ask where the fuck Riviere, Ferreya and Cabella were for this game. Well, we know the answer really. Ferreya appears to have been some kind of brain-blip whilst Riviere is simply not good enough and is an inferior player to Shola Ameobi or Leon Best. Those two were hardly the recipients of universal acclaim when they were at United. As for Cabella – he just appears to be far too lightweight and unsuited to the physical demands of the Premier League. That was immediately obvious from the first time he crossed the white-line.

But this week gone wasn’t just about the derby. It was also about a LC Quarter Final at Spurs where once again, we failed to turn up and weren’t just defeated, we were humiliated. I’m sure you’ll correct me if I’m wrong but almost 25% of games this calendar year have resulted in Pardew’s team losing by 3 or more goals. It makes me laugh when I read and hear Pardew’s teams being described as well-drilled by pundits. Well-drilled? Really? Jesus Christ!

This was the biggest week in United’s season and Pardew, once again has failed, failed, failed to even make a competition of it at Spurs and spunked a local derby at home.

I completely expect United to lose heavily at Old Trafford (the standard 3-goal margin defeat). I anticipate the atmosphere at SJP for the visit of Everton will be toxic and for Burnley on New Year’s Day to be desperate. I am absolutely unshakeable in my view that we will lose to Leicester in the FA Cup. I believe we have enough points on the board to convince Ashley he doesn’t need to sign a striker and that a big sale(s) is possible. I do wonder if Cisse is being wrapped in cotton wool so they can move him on in January but the likes of Sissoko and Tiote (no loss) might also generate more money for the parasite in charge of our club.

Then the club will limp over the line with Pardew again making false promises of summer investment and round and round we go again. Same as it ever was. Nothing he ever says ever happens.

This is an empty club led by a snake-oil salesman and utter charlatan in the dug-out. Four years after he took over from Chris Hughton and I will insist he has taken the club backwards. The playing staff is inferior and the coaching has gone nowhere.

There is no way back now. It is time for Alan Pardew for once in his time at Newcastle United to do the decent thing and resign.

Keep On, Keepin’ On ….