Where do you summon up the words to describe the position that Newcastle United has walked into? How can anyone articulate the continuing sense of outrage, bitterness and frustration so continually? And how do readers maintain their interest in reading the same emotions repeated over and over again? We are very close to the point where the anger that has pock-marked much of Mike Ashley’s eight-years at United is no longer sustainable. Our emotions can no longer be stretched so far and so the energy required to retain that continuing indignation are fizzling out into resignation and apathy.
I hear good, solid, life-long Black & Whiters express the wish that relegation does come to pass. Not because they hate the club but because they love it. It’s not particularly a sentiment I share but I understand the reasoning. Personally, I don’t think relegation would solve the Ashley blight but neither do I believe Premiership survival will either. There are no certainties and if relegation does come, it’s my view the whole club could unravel and we could drop like Leeds, like Wolves, Sheff Wednesday into League 1 as Ashley ensured he pulled the parachute money out of United.
I worry also about a time post-Ashley because I don’t believe it will be a clean break and as he’s done at Rangers he will pull us into the quicksand of his merchandising and image rights grasping.
If I’m honest, I see Premiership survival as the least worst option but that’s just my take on it and I don’t claim any higher wisdom than those wishing relegation upon a club they have devoted their lives to and is a part of the fabric of families, communities and our proud city and region.
How did the simple act of falling in love with Newcastle United become so fucked up?
So, we go towards the last act of the season’s rotten drama. If there is a Panto villain role to be filled then Allardyce, the football anti-christ unloved in his brief Tyneside tenure is unquestionably the man. I almost expect him to walk down the tunnel in a black cape, wide-brimmed hat holding a carton bomb before KO.
How did we get here?
We have sailed onto these crocks because those notionally on the starboard bow have fallen sleep at their posts. Ashley, as has been repeated to the point of nausea has no wish to invest in the club, give it any clear direction (other than it not to cost him time or money), use it simply as a method to promote his awful business and pay down the debt he created. He has appointed the supine to positions of authority. What he says goes and where we are going God only knows.
God only knows the breadth of Charnley’s authority at United but this tea-boy may have wanted to show off with his profit and surplus but is now threatening to sink the whole of the good ship Newcastle United because the main simply does not understand football.
Then there is Carver. A man so pitifully out of his depth I almost feel sympathy for him but his oafish uselessness has numbed me to any empathy for him. He is set to become reviled within his own city, his own community – forever. Enough has been said and written about QPR on Saturday but frankly you might have said the same so many times before.
So, where we are?
Where we are is being beseeched by Carver to support the team, create a big atmosphere to howl the team over the line. Some of you reading this will be up for that but I’m dreading the whole thing. This team has nothing in it, there is no connection between the pitch and the stands. The ties are torn.
If there is anything to make me throw into the toilet it is being told what to do by Sir John Hall or Freddie Shepherd, how we should support the team. These are men who grew fat and bloated on the wealth of Newcastle United and sold it to the first dupe who would upholster them further with wealth. I’d be surprised if either man has been near a United game, home or away since the day they flogged our club to a man who never had the right intentions.
So Sunday will be excruciating. Our fate is in our hands going into the last game but frankly Hull have more chance of beating Man Utd on Humberside than we do of defeating West Ham at St James’ Park. I have no faith in the manager or the players and suspect our fate rests in the hands of the team from Old Trafford. It’s truly a desperate situation.
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Many thanks to Kriss Fee who gave us an eye-witness account of some particularly bad dickhead behaviour around King’s Cross on Saturday. Our best wishes go to anyone injured and it has been gratifying to receive notes of various types from Everton fans, ashamed of the knobheads amongst them.
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We have an issue of true faith out right now – we did a bit of a promotion about what’s in it – just click here.
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This coming Friday Alex Hurst and the lads who do the true faith : WEEKLY PODCAST will be continuing with their show in partnership with Radio Northumberland. You can listen into the show here. They will doubtless have another podcast out this week as well.
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Don’t forget to sign up for The Special for this coming Sunday. It will be the last one of the season, thank God. Just click here.
Keep On, Keepin’ On …
R I P jc the original can not preforma miracle at nufc nevermind ARSEHOLE CARVER
Premiership or Championship next season matters not to me. A season ticket boycott campaign has to be pursued; it has been proven that the club are terrified of that as the hard cash upfront disappears and the legitimacy that a full stadium gives to the regime in the eyes of the world is lost. Fans hold the key and still they don’t realise it. I’ll be joining Pat and co. outside SJP until the leech is forced to sell and leave.
So a couple of weeks ago we started to make Ashley feel uncomfortable with the protests.Now we appear to be backing off, just as we were making progress.I give not one jot whether we get relegated, my only interest is ridding ourselves of this cancer at our club.What plans are we making for the weekend? I only attend (since boycotting years ago) if we are going to make our voice heard by way of further protests.That can be before or after the game for those who still actually feel any support helps.Please let’s not let him off the hook for a nice long summer!
I think AshleyOut are planning some form of protest and will no doubt let us know soon. I may not be renewing but I’ll still be up for any protests outside the ground next season
From what I have heard, only rumours mind, is that if we are relegated there will be a sit in at full time, unfortunately I wont be attending as I gave up my ticket a few seasons ago if its true I think its a canny idea and will make Geordie discontent perfectly clear in front of the Sky cameras!
Viva la Revolution!
Here’s what’ll happen on Sunday.
Hull will score within a couple of minutes after kick-off and for the remaining 88 mins will be battered from corner flag to corner flag. At some stage they (Hull) will have a player sent off but at 90 mins it will be 1-0.
Because they are playing the mancs the Ref will be obliged to add at least 9 minutes extra time during which Hull will have another player sent off but will hang on for a famous win.
Meanwhile, at SJP our heroes will show some sort of effort for the first ten mins or so with the crowd roaring them on but then revert to type (and carver’s tactics) and proceed to hoof the ball aimlessly around the pitch. West Ham will then stroll up the park and, without any semblance of resistance, score.
During the second half our lads will meander around aimlessly chatting amongst themselves speculating where they will be playing next season and West Ham will score a second with about 5 mins to go. At the final whistle the vast majority of fans will turn to their seat neighbours, shake hands, wish them a pleasant summer and look forward to seeing them next season as usual.
John Carver will then tell us that he will be the No.1 outstanding coach in the championship next season and then the outstanding No.1 coach in the first division the season after that and so on and so on. Lee Charnley will remind us that it is OUR club and that we MUST support the team unequivocally. Mike Shitbag will remain totally silent.
Enjoy!!!!!
Pretty much spot on apart from the seat neighbours bit – we will collectively give a huge sigh of relief, wish each other the best, arrange to keep in touch perhaps but not at SJP and complete the eviction process through the doors of our home for many years
Assuming Vin1892 is on a poorly executed fishing trip here but you could argue that 11 or 12 of the teams in the league bring absolutely nothing to it other than trying to stay in it and, Crystal Palace apart every team has a shit home support. That’s what happens when your ordinary Joe can’t afford to watch his team anymore and has been replaced by wealthy families and corporates.
I’d argue that, beyond the top 10, the Premiership is absolute dross. Hull, Villa, NUFC and Sunderland staying up last year despite their post-Christmas performances tells you everything you need to know about the best league in the world (… my eye).
Having said that, I can’t blame people for getting fed up with NUFC in particular: we are throwing games. Loic Remy basically called Pardew’s lie (about Remy being unavailable with an “injury”) following the Liverpool game last season. Had Liverpool gone on to win the Premiership, we would have played a role in distorting the final table. And let’s not even go into the (even more) weakened teams we are fielding for cup competitions. We are a different level of disgrace at the moment.
At the end of the day do we really deserve to stop in the Premier League? On our performances over the last 14 months you have to say no. What do we bring to the table? – our away support is full of dickheads, our home support is the worst of the 20 clubs and our football is a boring, negative, predictable pile of shit. We don’t want to compete for a European place or try for a domestic cup competition so the PL position is best given to a football club who is going to try and compete to the best of their ability. The PL doesn’t need NUFC anymore because we bring nothing to the table, football wise. I dare bet that most of the supporters of the other clubs wish relegation on us because we draw far more media attention than we actually warrant from our performances.
It’s a funny one like the whole relegation issue. I used to be sold on the idea that relegation would be beneficial to us long-term in getting rid of Ashley but I’m slightly more torn on the issue now. The £34m in the bank is a tough one to work out.
Obviously the club will keep turning a profit and being ran in the same farcical fashion, but that money has to go somewhere in the accounts, so will they keep adding to this pile of cash indefinitely? The transfer policy is unlikely to change and the TV money will continue to increase. He seems reluctant to reduce his debt, and presumably we’ll be getting paid interest on the newly-acquired cash balance. We’ve never had cash in the accounts before and £34m is a fuck load of money really, more than he spends on transfers that’s for sure. Is it just because there’s nowhere else to put the money?
What was the whole ‘he’s definitely here until at least 2016’ crack in that club statement last year all about? Kind of implies that he must have at least thought about selling the club, and that there may be a potential exit strategy there, god-willing. Staying in the premier league may help that prospect become more realistic, given how profitable the club has shown itself to be in the top flight.
On the relegation side however I wonder why there ever would be a desire for him to stop making money within the club whilst gaining world-wide advertising for what is now a global company. John Hall said that Ashley had told him that’s what his intentions were, to promote SD around the world. Not that John Hall cared, he knew Ashley had the cash he wanted and I assume he purposefully didn’t mention the stadium loan repayment clause either.
Could the threat of him losing money on the club make him want to bail? He rarely loses overall and I’m inclined to think that he would stock with us and gamble that we would come back up. Why do we really care about staying in the top division anyway though, it’s a joke of a competition. You can still watch the games and check the scores and that in the Championship.
If we do stay up Ashley’s likely to spend just enough (of the club’s money, not his) to ensure safety next year – if there ever was a good chance of going down now is the time. I’m in two minds as to whether this could be an opportunity missed if Hull get beat. Either way, whatever happens we will be disappointed, that’s the only certainty.
Chris, although he may make a loss on the club, it is a drop in the ocean to the money he has made on the global exposure SD has received. I think the value of SD has more than doubled since he took over the club.
Just heard the players have had the day off and the greatest coach in the league is at a golfing event……..Is anybody actually taking this seriously anymore? I’m starting to think I’m loosing my bloody marbles, a bloody day off training when we defend set pieces like we do and struggle to take a fucking kick off and John the tongue is swinging his golf bats about and having a bit of banter with the other sacks of shite on our coaching team?!!!! I just don’t know what to say……
Our club is a joke.
My balls hurt
Bet Mike Ashley was the kid on your estate who was a bit of a loner, had no good patter and nowt really going for him other than he had the best ball so you knocked on him to come out and play. When the slighest thing didn’t go his way he would pick his ball up and fuck off home.
It absolutely says it all that every fan I’ve spoken to since QPR has spoken about the Hull game being the one that decides our fate. No-one has any faith that when masters of their own destiny this bunch of misfits could pull something cohesive together and get a win. Fundamentally, if Hull win we’re down.
I feel sorry for a couple of the lads we have on the playing staff. Honestly, although it pains me to say it I’d completely understand why Daryl Janmaat would want to leave, and I wouldn’t hold any grudges against him if he did. Jack Colback has struggled on his own in midfield for the last few weeks but has been unable to compensate from no-heart Sissoko and no-legs Ryan Taylor. Jonas Gutierrez is a cracking bloke and a fine model for the black and white shirt – but at any other club shouldn’t have to be playing as much as he is. And not everyone will agree, but I feel for both Mehdi Abeid and Paul Dummett – the latter as a player who has shown signs of improvement and effort, and the latter who was at the core of our 6-game winning run but has since, bizarrely, found first-team action hard to come by.
The rest of them can leave for all I care. Even if we stop up I think the next two seasons might be agonizing. How many players have contracts that are up this summer and the summer of 2016?
Another spot on piece that articulates what most are feeling. As you say keep the faith. Even if we drop like Leeds we will be back. It might take a while but Ashley won’t be here forever.