Hahahahaha. Football used to be good didn’t it? Jesus Christ man. Finish the whole thing. Put it to bed and out of our misery. What a farce. What a finish. World’s luckiest manager and we’re still shit.

It’s a good point. But I can’t pretend that it was fun or it was worth the effort. United were dire today and deserved nothing.

To my complete surprise United went back to the trusted (but mostly terrible under this manager) ‘back five’ which has afforded so many teams so much of the ball last season. Included were central midfield player Isaac Hayden playing out of position and Joelinton in the team (some would say out of position but then the same is said when he plays up front so where he’s meant to fit in I’ve no idea).

Expectations weren’t high and no Ryan Fraser or Saint Maximin compounded the feeling of dread. Sky Sports did their but with a graphic displaying that Steve Bruce has lost nine of his 11 against part-time Mag Jose Mourinho. We started terribly when full-time liability Jonjo Shelvey needlessly gifted our opponents a lovely free kick opportunity within the first minute. The much questioned Karl Darlow pulled off two superb saves back to back. Brilliant from the stand in. Minutes later Harry Kane was again unmarked (howay lads man) and Darlow again denied him when a goal looked certain. Well done Karl but our prospects were not looking particularly pleasant.

Eventually the break through came when Spurs broke and Kane played a simple ball to the back post and it was tapped in by Mourha. Dreadful from Matt Ritchie.

Immediately after Spurs should have scored twice more, with the latter chance another smart save from Darlow. Spurs had probably been in second or third gear and could legitimately say they could have been four or five up. They hit the post soon after that. After 30 minutes Tottenham had 8 shots to United’s 0. Spurs had more chances toward the end of the half and hit the bar again.

I appreciate there’s a lot of competition for this but that’s the worst 45 minutes of football under this manager. Spurs could  have been five goals up and still would have felt aggrieved at not scoring more. Pathetic from the very first minute. Just like last week.

Spurs took off Son at half time, probably thinking this sort of thing was beneath such a good player. Spurs regularly made good chances look like half chances and Darlow continued to churn out decent saves.

The game followed a bit of a weird pattern with Spurs just tossing it off and letting us have the ball a bit, us doing nothing with it and just giving it back to Spurs. After 67 minutes Bruce took off Ritchie (who was dire) and on came Murphy and Lewis. We’d gone back to four at the back and there seemed to be more of a plan.

Apart from long balls forward we had nought of note. Then a madness when AC headed the ball against Eric Dier’s arm. Dier was facing the other direction and only had his arm out as he was jumping. After an age the referee awarded a hilarious penalty. Hilarious. So undeserved. So pointless and needless. We’ll have it though.

Wilson (just) scores and we take a point. A disgrace to point but there’s no description on the league table. A personal view? It’s ruining the game. Not just this but VAR in general. But that’s for another time.

You’ll take a point at Spurs but being serious for a moment there’s no identity to this side. Two shots on target in three games against none of the leagues ‘top sides’. It’s hilariously shite. It’s so bad it’s scarcely believable. The manager has a habit of just denying the reality in front of him in interviews, which is probably why we keep getting served up this utter dross.

This is Steve Bruce’s team. He’s had money to spend and time in the job. For this to be the end product almost defies belief. The only positive thing about today bar the point is I didn’t spend £200 on a trip to London to witness it.

He needs to take the good fortune and move on. We can’t play that formation, and we can’t go into games against anyone and just hope they don’t have their shooting boots on so we only lose by two or three. It’s not good enough.

Well done Karl Darlow and well done Callum Wilson for keeping his head. The rest of them? Not good enough and it needs to stop. We have two winnable games this week. The manager needs good performances in both.