Whether you’re looking for a pick me up from the COVID pandemic you’ve probably come to the wrong article or you want to lie in the self pity like myself. Newcastle United before the season even fucking starts is looking more and more like a rabbit in the headlights than a club United.

Who remembers looking forward to a season with the attitude of what if? Not me, at least when we dropped to the championship both times there was a smudge of optimism spreading about the club but this preseason has been utterly shite. Losing to York, drawing to Rotherham, hallmarks of 2015/16 preseason anyone? Where we lost a preseason game at York and got relegated 9 months later?

A club going through the doldrums of what on the face of it looks like a losing battle with arbitration and a CAT case upcoming. So with this “impending takeover” that is never going to happen, the optimism should be there, nope we have fighting with our own fans happening right now as we speak about this very subject. Pointless posts, fake news spreading and general shithousery that comes with social media.

A club that has refused to spend any money so far in the transfer window or even sign a player on a free transfer (the only club in the premier league to do so, so far). A manager who promises not to “Bullshit” fans whilst simultaneously bullshitting fans. An owner who only makes statements or pops up when it serves his own self interests.

A side that looked complete and utter shite for three quarters of the season and having the promise of another turgid outlook with Bruceball coming in to full swing in 3 weeks time. Can we as a club take another season of rancid turd being thrown at us for another year?

Then we have a club that wants its loyal fans to purchase a ticket based on all of the above and they’re somehow scratching their heads at why they’ve got shit loads of seats available to purchase? Only the insane or the fucking stupid are willing enough to buy a season ticket (unfortunately, I count myself in those categories, I can’t possibly lose those loyalty points that gains me access to more shit but further away).

Ah yes the optimism is coursing through my veins right now, outlook for the next 9 months is a shitstorm followed by a shitshower.

Toon Toon.